You always initiate communication – whether through a text message, Facebook message, email or phone call.He rarely communicates with you just to see how you’re doing, and when he does call it’s because he wants something or a favor from you.You text each other more than you physically talk to or see each other, or when you call him and leave him voice mails he responds with text messages only and rarely calls, especially not at night.You slack off a bit, but then “out of the blue” he sends you a text message, a “How are you?” Excited, you engage in the back and forth, but yet he still never asks to take you out on a date.

You feel you two have a true connection, and that when you first met him there was definitely something there as sparks flew – but for some reason he hasn’t taken any next steps to get to know you better on a more personal level.

If this describes your situation at all, then you may be the back pocket chick.

The back pocket chick is the girl on reserve, or on hold because either he’s already in a relationship or hasn’t completely made up his mind about you.

No worries though, if you’re interested in a guy and he hasn’t initiated any next steps, then it’s okay to leave it at the acquaintance or friendship level while continuing to go on with your life.

Leave the 2 hour long conversations and the late in the midnight hour encouragement from you for someone who really deserves it and who truly appreciates the value and the gift in you – not someone who is barely there when you need him and rarely responds when you call.

Don’t waste your time thinking about a guy who obviously isn’t thinking about you.

It’s fine to be cordial or respond when he communicates if that’s what you desire to do, but don’t put all your eggs in that basket or take yourself “off the market” because of someone who hasn’t made a decision about how he feels about you yet.
Don’t be the desperate back pocket chick who calls all the time or regularly asks him out, only for him to go along to entertain you and string you along on a road that obviously leads to no where.

The man of God who God has for you will come correct and there will be no second guessing.

God is not the author of confusion and you will be blessed with peace.
So, in the meantime, be grateful for any new friendships you develop along the way and continue to run your race while loving and valuing yourself enough to not sit by the phone and wait for any man to call in order to validate you.
For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints. 1 Corinthians 14:33
I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. Psalm 139:14
Kim Brooks, author of bestselling novels, She That Findeth, He\'s Fine...But is He Saved? and more.

Published by Kim Brooks

A refreshing voice for today’s Christian single, Kim Brooks is the Award-winning, National Bestselling author of novel, He's Fine...But is He Saved? its sequel and her latest novel, She That Findeth - an Atria/Simon & Schuster release. As a licensed minister, she is also the author of several self-help books and eBooks including, How To Date and Stay Saved and Singles, Overcome! A former guest columnist for Gospel Today and with appearances on The Word Network and in EBONY Magazine, Kim Brooks shares, through the Word of God, how it is possible to live an exciting, purpose-driven, drama-free abstinent until marriage lifestyle in the perfect will of God. Subscribe to her free daily devotional for singles, which reaches thousands globally, and for more information about her books and booking visit