Is it possible to be alone, but not alone? Or alone, but not lonely? Sometimes it seems like every waking day of our lives we, singles, are reminded of the fact that we don’t have a mate; whether it’s walking in the mall observing couples, driving, billboards, magazines, watching couples in church raise their tithe envelope together during offering, hearing it from family or married friends who want to “marry you off,” or even enjoying a movie. Movies like Tyler Perry’s, “Why Did I Get Married?” have some singles in a tizzy
wondering why all the drama, and can I just get married first?
For this issue of The Single Heart, I am led to remind you that it IS possible for one to
be alone, but not lonely. Or alone, but not alone. The word, “alone,” in Webster’s 1828
Edition Dictionary means: single, without the presence of another, and without company.
The word, “lonely” denotes a feeling, and it means: abandoned, forsaken, friendless,
lonely-heart, and lonesome.
According to Genesis, the first man God created was Adam. Before God gave man a wife,
He gave him a job, which was to till the ground and guard and protect it – Gen. 2:15
(which means ladies, if brotha man tries to holla, make sure he at least has a j – o – b!)
God delighted in His fellowship time with His creation, man, who was created in God’s
own image and likeness (Gen. 1:26)
There was no indication that Adam was anywhere sitting at the dock of the bay singing,
“Woe is me. I’m lonely. Nobody knows…” No, Adam was enjoying his time spent in the
presence of God, naming the animals, working on his God-given assignment, and having a
good ‘ole time.
As you read the text, you’ll notice that it was God’s idea to create a help meet for Adam,
and not Adam’s (Gen. 2:18). God presented Adam with his mate, and Adam recognized
who she was. Also notice that God did the presenting, and He knew exactly what Adam
wanted (physical attraction) and needed (help).
God had a plan for mankind. He wanted mankind to multiply so He could have a godly world
full of His children – or those who are called by His name. We all know that when Adam
disobeyed God in the Garden of Eden that that plan was thwarted, but thank God for
sending Jesus, in the form of a second Adam, as our Redeemer! Jesus’ death and
resurrection symbolizes restoration. Our lives have been restored back to fellowship
with God. Not only that, God not only is omnipresent, but He also is in us as
2 Corinthians 6:16 states, “…ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said,
I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall
be my people.”
He also reminds us in His Word:
…I will never leave you nor forsake you. (Hebrews 13:5)
…there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother. (Proverbs 18:24)
…for thou are with me, thy rod and thy staff comfort me. (Psalm 23:4)
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1)
For these reasons and more, single believers should never feel lonely, because with Him,
you’re never alone. He is there, all the time, waiting to hear from you. Waiting to
fellowship with you every waking hour. Waiting for you to seek His face because He has
some secrets from His Word that He wants to share. He wants to share His own unique,
divine assignment that He has especially for you (Eph. 2:10, Phil. 1:6).
Whether you’re alone as a result of not having a significant other in your life, never
been married, or having been divorced or widowed – you may be alone, but you’re not alone.
God has been there with you, every step of the way, and He’s still there – loving you,
keeping You, and holding you in His ever loving arms.