He comes to church every Sunday. He sits in the same seat in the third row on the right side of the sanctuary every week. His big leather-bound black Bible is placed firmly in his lap.
He shouts with the rest of the congregation when it’s time to praise God, and he lifts up both his hands when it’s time to worship Him. He hears the morning sermon, says “Praise the Lord,” right along with the pastor, and can quote almost every Scripture the pastor references verbatim.
Then he steps one foot inside the parking lot of the church and pulls out his pack of Kools and smokes a cigarette. During his drive home he’s filled with road rage as he swears and flips someone the bird who tries to cut him off at an intersection.
When he finally makes it home, he pulls out a forty from the frig and turns the
latest Fifty Cent CD up real loud until his neighbor in the adjacent apartment has to
bang on the wall to tell him to be quiet.
He plops down on the couch, pulls out his flip cell phone, scrolls through his phone book
and decides he wants some company tonight. He sees a name he vaguely remembers – Ajanay.
He remembers her remarkable booty more than her somewhat attractive face. The last time
he saw her three weeks ago she had long jet black weave all the way down to her waist.
But he didn’t care; besides, he had made up in his mind that tonight wasn’t going to be
about running his fingers through her hair anyway.
“Hey baby,” he says after dialing her number, “This Tyrone. Whatchadoin’ tonight?
Just call me Marvin Gaye, baby, because tonight I’m in need of some of your sexual
healing.” He ends the call with a slight laugh and a smile, delighted that his request
for a night in between the sheets did not go ignored.
I’m aware that for some of you reading this scenario, a brotha you know may
immediately come to mind. He may claim salvation, and may show up in church service
every week, but behind closed doors, what is his life really like?
Is he a Christian just on Sunday morning, or is he one seven days a week?
Does he live the lifestyle of a man who is “saved,” or does he just view the title of
salvation as simply “fire insurance” protecting his soul from a burning hell?
Does he sincerely fear the Lord, obey His commandments, and desire to be more like Him,
or does he just show up at church so he can meet a good, clean church woman he can
turn out and turn into a freak of the week?
Do not be deceived, women of God.
Beware of lip service that is not coupled with like actions which line up with the Word
of God. If he were truly a man of God, he would not force you to sleep with him to
prove your love for him, and he would not cause you to compromise your beliefs, or
your right-standing relationship with your Heavenly Father.
Even though a man may say he is saved, make sure that his proclamation is accompanied
by a lifestyle conducive to that of a Christian. Determine whether or not he is a man
after God’s own heart, a man who walks in integrity, and one who truly loves the Lord
and would never intentionally sin or disappoint God because of his genuine love for his
Don’t get me wrong; there are some good men out there – good, saved men who love Jesus
and has made Jesus not just their Savior but also the Lord of their lives.
You just have to be careful, watch and pray, and observe his actions when he thinks
no one is watching, so you can have a better idea of whether or not his salvation
profession is sincere.
So the next time a man asks you out on a date, ladies, not only should you make sure
the brotha is saved, but also find out if he is for real.
A refreshing voice for today’s Christian single, Kim Brooks is the Award-winning, National Bestselling author of novel, He's Fine...But is He Saved? its sequel and her latest novel, She That Findeth - an Atria/Simon & Schuster release. As a licensed minister, she is also the author of several self-help books and eBooks including, How To Date and Stay Saved and Singles, Overcome! A former guest columnist for Gospel Today and with appearances on The Word Network and in EBONY Magazine, Kim Brooks shares, through the Word of God, how it is possible to live an exciting, purpose-driven, drama-free abstinent until marriage lifestyle in the perfect will of God. Subscribe to her free daily devotional for singles, which reaches thousands globally, and for more information about her books and booking visit www.KimOnTheWeb.com