It’s Valentine’s Day – the day when most normally celebrate with a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates, topped off by a romantic evening which may ultimately lead to the bedroom if the guy is lucky, right? Or so they say.
What’s a Christian couple to do in a culture that promotes promiscuity and the notion that ‘sex sells’ with its many suggestive advertisements and other media?
In other words, how can a Christian couple date and “Stay Saved” on Valentine’s Day?
In my book, How to Date and Stay Saved, I answer this question and also explain how to date God’s way and in His proper order and how it is possible for a couple to meet, date, and enjoy a romantic relationship while not having sex until after he ‘put a ring on it’ and marries you.
Below are 7 ways to date and “Stay Saved” on Valentine’s Day:
1. Date in Public.
Most people aren’t inclined to ‘get their groove on’ in a public place where the public is watching. Dinner and a movie on Valentine’s Day is nice and also romantic.
2. Date to encourage dialogue.
As you date in public, gather information about the person you’re dating. Seek friendship before romance. Constant verbal communication during the date also helps prevent ‘holy hands’ from roaming.
3. Dress modestly.
Valentine’s Day is already set up to be a romantic night on the town, so the flesh is already ready to receive something even before the date begins; ladies, don’t give it any more stimulus such as wearing a low cut blouse exposing the girls or a super tight ‘booty hugging’ skirt. That man is already in a trance about how fine you are so don’t be a stumbling block to him during your date. As much as we love a nice compliment, focus on dressing modestly yet still attractive and stylish.
4. Turn Luther off!
As you and your date converse, there may be music playing in the background, such as during the car ride. Instead of playing “Maxwell” or something else meant to get you in the mood, instead play gospel music such as gospel jazz or praise and worship. Doing this sets the environment and it keeps your mind focused on above. I have a saying: Music is like a ride, it’s meant to take you someplace, so don’t allow the music you listen to during your date take you somewhere you don’t want to go.
5. View each other as brother and sister during your date.
Would you take your sibling home after a night on the town in order to ‘get it on’ like Marvin Gaye? Remember that you’re brothers and sisters in Christ, first, before you will ever be anyone’s spouse or bedroom partner so treat each other accordingly.
6. No ‘late in the midnight hour’ dating at home.
As tempting as it may seem, and no matter how fine he may look especially after he ‘wines and dines you’ (with sparkling apple juice, of course) on your date topped off with a serenade by the lead singer at the restaurant as your date professes his love for you in front of a bunch of strangers, don’t invite that man inside your home afterward, and by all means, don’t go to his place. The night has been too perfect and the holiday is already set to be topped off with a roll in the hay. Instead, after you date in public, once he takes you home kindly thank him for a wonderful night and get inside!
7. If you insist on continuing the date after he has dropped you off at home, call or text.
This way you can still verbally communicate with each other and finish your date, instead of having your date come over and you wake up in the morning regretting what went down the night before.
A refreshing voice for today’s Christian single, Kim Brooks is the Award-winning, National Bestselling author of novel, He's Fine...But is He Saved? its sequel and her latest novel, She That Findeth - an Atria/Simon & Schuster release. As a licensed minister, she is also the author of several self-help books and eBooks including, How To Date and Stay Saved and Singles, Overcome! A former guest columnist for Gospel Today and with appearances on The Word Network and in EBONY Magazine, Kim Brooks shares, through the Word of God, how it is possible to live an exciting, purpose-driven, drama-free abstinent until marriage lifestyle in the perfect will of God. Subscribe to her free daily devotional for singles, which reaches thousands globally, and for more information about her books and booking visit www.KimOnTheWeb.com